Fast Pass

I'm certain there is a line in heaven--probably a single file, sign in here, get your picture taken with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates sort of line.

AND--I'm certain the line is long- come on, this is Heaven--everybody wants in. One other thing I'm certain of, is that there are select individuals that get a "fast pass" to the front of the line. No waiting, here you go, you won the "get out of line free today" card.

Wanna know who gets one??

It's those people that let you in front of them in the line of traffic- full of insanely rude individuals trying to get home from work 30 seconds earlier. The ones that let you go ahead at the grocery store when your hands are full of crying kids and crap you're buying for them. And let us not forget those people at the amusement park who let you on the ride to spare everyone else from your screaming brat.

I aspire to be one of them. Sometimes it seems easy, and other times (when I'm feeling selfish) very, very hard. So remember, when you want a "fast pass" to Heaven, it's not the Goody Two-Shoes who gets them--or at least that's what I'd like to think!

Happy Birthday Ava

Here's a little something I put together for her Birthday. It could be better, but it's 1:45am, I'm crying now, and I'd give almost anything to rewind and enjoy this year all over again.

Happy Birthday my sweet baby girl! We love you and are so grateful to have you in our family.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

You're invited

Ava is 1!

Please join us for a BBQ to
celebrate Ava’s 1st Birthday!

Saturday August 8th 2009
4:00pm
No gifts necessary.

I know most of you live too far to come, but you're invited anyway. We'll be having a small get together Saturday- if you live close by please come celebrate with us. We can't let her turn 1 without noticing. (be our pretend family for the evening!) RSVP ---the poor kid can't even eat her own Birthday cake :-(

Santa's got it easy

Yes, he does.

We reached a new parental milestone at our house that has me believing that Santa takes the easy way out. I mean really, all he has to do is drop down the chimney and leave some presents in the living room. How hard is that?

Then there's the Easter Bunny. His job is a little tougher. He actually has to enter the childrens' rooms and leave the basket at the foot of their bed. This requires a little more skill than Santa.

My new hero however, is the Tooth Fairy. Now this is a childhood figure to be revered by the Lot of them. Come on--she has to sneak in their room, take the tooth out from under the child's pillow, and replace it with some shiny coins--all without waking the sleeping child. (or at least that is what's suppose to happen.)

Colonel Mustard and I had our first acquaintance with the Tooth Fairy a couple of weeks ago. He went in first to "extract" the tooth from under the pillow. In the process he awoke the child, made some lame excuse for why he was in his room in the first place, and got farted at. No joke. Andrew rolled over and farted at him--which sent us both into the hall attempting to stifle our hysterical laughing for the next 10 minutes. Colonel Mustard managed to get the tooth, but he gave up and sent me back in to attempt putting the money under Andrew's head.

I'm proud to say the mission was a success, (after 30 minutes) but far more nerve-wracking than any feat of Santa or the Easter Bunny! Props to the Tooth Fairy- I never knew how hard her job was. She even has to obsess about how much money to put under the pillow so as not to "spoil the child" or be construed as "cheap."

So here's a look at Andrew's new smile!
Well, almost. He lost the other bottom tooth the next day and the Tooth Fairy was at it again. I'm happy to report the second attempt went a little bit smoother!

Moon Willow

You know those stupid tests on Facebook- What's your personality type? When will you get pregnant? What are you born to do? What swearword best describes you? What's your ghetto name? (my personal favorite!)

Colonel Mustard logged onto my Facebook and took the quiz "What's your Native American Name?" Turns out he's.............. "Moon Willow." (fitting- his parents really were hippies--wish I had a baby picture for you )

Sounded like fun, so I went back and took the quiz again and guess what my name is????............................"Thunder Horse!"

Yea, that's right. Guess we know who wears the pants in this house......Thunder Horse!

So.......... before I say anymore and earn myself a place on the couch tonight, let me just leave you with a parting shot of............. Moon Willow.



If you don't see me for a while I'm sure you can take a guess at what happened to me!

And the Winner is...

...."tilapia, Squash, rice."

Yeah for Jaime! Please let me know what flavor you'd like!

For all 8 of you (my huge audience) who read this- better luck next time. Colonel Mustard really liked the descriptive entries, but I guess he was just in the mood for fish- lucky Jaime- he almost threw you out 'cause he didn't know how the Tilapia was cooked! And Amber (Bryan)- you almost won because he wanted cantaloupe, but he wanted more info. on the baked chicken!

Before you cry and get too upset, watch in the near future- I just might have a second chance for you to win!

A Little Contest

Here's how you play. Leave a comment on this post about what you had for dinner tonight. Colonel Mustard is judging and I have no idea what the criteria is. (Isn't that fun!)

A couple of rules.

1) You cannot win if you post anonymously, so make sure your name is on there. (Names will not be seen by Colonel Mustard- he can't play favorites- if you really don't want to take two seconds to make a blogger account I will accept e-mail entries).

2) You CANNOT lie!-- and since none of us know what his judging criteria will be, would it really do you any good?

THE PRIZE

A dozen (or more- depending on what I can fit in the box) cakeballs in the flavor of your choice.

Chocolate
Chocolate Mint
Red Velvet
or German Chocolate

Contest ends Friday at 10pm EST. Good Luck!